The world of social media may have us believe that this concept is unnecessary, especially since it is a widespread idea that the world should be the stage for everything that one produces. From baby pictures, to complaints, to cat memes to bragging rights, the idea that we need to share with the world every minute detail of our life has taken firm hold in modern day psyche.
Not everyone though. One of my roles at work is to design and install building-wide wifi in our low income apartment complexes. I remember doing a job in Soldier's Grove, Wisconsin, population 552 and sinking. One senior man came up to me, and asked me what I was doing. When I told him, he huffed and said, "Nobody around here uses that stuff." This somewhat shocking statement made me think that in some ways they were the lucky ones.
After all, if the social media world is a stage, we are the actors tied to the roles the world wants us to see. Diversion from it means a dearth of likes, shares, et cetera. The result is a world full of people putting off their genuine natures.
I believe that we all have beliefs that are not popular or politically correct. If we do not take the time to properly express these, we are being dishonest with ourselves.
Of course, choosing one's audience is important. It does no good to incite a social feed riot over a certain issue - rather the opposite. We must strive to be wise enough to know when to express certain thoughts to close or trusted friends, or in some cases, keep it to ourselves. There is no perfect formula to this, but putting attention to it will improve matters over time.
It is, however, important to express it somewhere. It could be an email that is sent to no one or to one's self, or in a journal, or in a document in a private folder.
I have done this before, and it helps assuage the angst I am feeling about particular matters, especially ones that are unpopular. I have also shared my most private beliefs, beliefs which I'm sure would incite riots, with my wife. Even though she has not agreed with some of them, she has heard me out, perhaps pointed out flaws in my reasoning, and never loved me less because of them. When you are writing or posting or sharing to no one, or to your most trusted friends, you do not need to put on the proper filters to protect you from the lynch mobs, and it is cleansing.
A few weeks ago, a co-worker and I got on the subject of babies. He has none; I have done the baby thing twice so far. He does, however, have several nieces and nephews. At one point, he got a little quieter, and more timid and expressed to me in more roundabout language that he didn't really like the babies, or feel love for them until they were several months old. I doubt he told this to the mother on delivery day. I laughed, however, and told him that I'd heard several fathers, let alone uncles, say the same thing about their children, always in hushed tones, because it seems inappropriate.
To his point, how many people can say they love acquaintances at first sight? And babies personalities do not come out right away, and they brainwash you with their 24 hour schedule, ear splitting screams and constant defecation. Yet this newborn post got 163 likes and 33 comments, many of which calling him cute and beautiful, and so on. I love him so much more than I did on this day, but it really should be like that, shouldn't it?
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