Love is Like Climbing a Mountain

It was almost five years ago that my wife and I took a trip down to Ecuador. One of our favorite memories, shown below, was hiking up to the glacier on the Cotopaxi Volcano, which was at about 16,000 feet. It's the highest I've ever been (other than a plane) and let me tell you, your body feels different up there. Every step was a chore, and we had to rest after every 20 or so steps.

Since then, we have had two kids, achieved one Master's Degree, and bought a house. It's amazing how time does that to you. But I look at these pictures, and although we look younger, our love for each other is even more solidly established.

I've decided that love is much like climbing a mountain.

Many people try to define what love is, at what point they fall in love, and how to stay in love. I think "fall" is the wrong word because it implies something that happens by some outside force that acts upon you. I'd say that's true for attraction, or chemistry, but love is much more than that. Love is deliberate. Perhaps that misconception is why love eludes so many people.

"Climb" is a much more appropriate word.  Love is a choice, made day after day, in little steps, staring at the trail, or our feet, or our companion near us. It can seem ordinary and tiring. After all, when climbing up a mountain, especially at 16,000, every step takes conscious exertion.

But you recognize your progress in those moments when you pause, and you both turn back and look at the panorama that suddenly comes into view. You stand, arm in arm, witnessing your journey together in full view. It is breathtaking. You feel like rulers, or even creators, of a world, and you complete forget about your fatigue.

Of course, you cannot spend all of your time in this state of elation. I think some couples try to do this, and you know what? They never progress any further up the mountain, and their view remains infantile. To make love grow, you have to turn around and fix your focus back on the trail ahead of you. Love grows with the passage of time, and you have to keep putting in the effort to achieve that.

If you do, even greater heights and vistas await.